BRIII's Rendition.

Finals

Go die. :)

mmkay thats all! <3

Bittersweet.

So I guess I’m finally coming the the realization that High School has ended…College is here and is going to come at me with all it’s got. I cant help but feel scared out of my mind. The only reason I feel like that is because I don’t understand this. It’s new and that has always scared me. I feel like I’m ready, but I’m not. Inside there are two voices- One that tells me this is what I have worked for my entire life to get to this moment right now. The other is telling me that I will fail miserably and settle for less. I can’t help but have two voices always echoing in my head. Sadly, a misperception that many have is that I’m always someone that is happy, optimistic, and someone that will stay that way. The reality is that I’m human too. With my optimistic attutude comes one that will always tend to motivate me but hurt me all at the same time. My internal self has a self-destructive side. One that if I was to hurt enough, would overcome my entire life. Its done it once and wreaked havoc on my once young and impressionable self. But who’s to say it wont happen again. I need to have that other voice echoing louder than the other because only I can do it. I’m stubborn. Always have been. I do the opposite when one tells me not to. I guess it runs in my blood. But I can’t let that side of me get in my way. I have always told myself I have a goal achieve it. Now I know my goal. Self driven, Self cared for, Self destructive. When I went to lunch, I couldn’t help but see the same qualities in myself :(

I need this to convince myself that I can do this. Only I will be able to turn this around. Only I can really do this on my own. I will take care of myself, others, and be who I want to be along the way. A good person, with heart and perseverance with the courage to keep going. Of course, I may get lost sometimes, but I just have to always find my way back. I can and I will says voice one. I believe it too.

I know who I am and I’m only sad that you don’t know who you are. You play it off as if you do and sadly I just look at you and know that you are just as lost as many other people in this world. Please don’t take it out on me. I have only tried to help you. I have only tried to tell you what I think is best. Isn’t that what friends do? I guess youre done with me too. It’s okay, I’ll always be here if you need me, but I’m just sad I can no longer say the same on your part. I honestly don’t know what I did other than care and be who I always have been, and I’m sorry if that bothers you now.

Fire.

littlemiss:

aliehs:

Sometimes, other people’s problems stress me out. Do you think that’s weird? I mean, it hurts me when I see the ones I love hurt and/or struggle. Wouldn’t you feel the same way? I don’t know. I guess I feel helpless and it frustrates me. Sometimes I don’t know when to step in or interfere. Or I question myself if I should even interfere or even care so much in the first place. Is it any of my business? When is it my business? Never? Do I just turn the other cheek and let them continue their self destructive ways and bad behavior? Do I wait until something tragic happens? I mean, when is it okay to step in and say “hey, you’re not okay. don’t do this, don’t do that. you need help. talk to me. i am here for you. why are you doing this to yourself? why are you being this way?” Sometimes I don’t want to interfere at all. But then that makes me feel guilty because it’s as if I’m just standing there, watching them destroy themselves all the while I should be doing something. Or saying something. I do believe no one can save you but yourself. But I also know it doesn’t hurt having people there beside you, helping you along the way. Helping you find your way back to yourself, to what matters, to gaining control of your life, to being happy again. You can’t do it alone, I know that for sure. And I know, I know, I know, I knowwww- everything is easier said than done. I suppose it’s necessary to let people do their own thing. Sometimes people have to make big mistakes more than once before finally learning how wrong and bad that mistake is. It’s frustrating, but what can you do? I’ve said this before, and I’ll say it again- People will do whatever they want regardless of what you say and do. It is up to them, not you. It is their life, not yours. That’s kind of hard for me to grasp at times… But I’m slowly letting it sink in. I just hate watching people go down a bad road and feeling like I can’t do one stinkin’ thing about it. But, people make mistakes. We all make mistakes. All the time. Every day. It’s how we learn. It’s how we grow. But for some people, they have to make a lot of mistakes- big ones, to finally see clearly. When I see people I love struggle or hear of their problems, I always hope they find their way through it. I know that they can, even if it may take awhile… I still know that they can. They just have to believe and work hard at it. They also must remember that they are never alone, that their loved ones will always be there for them to help them, guide them, and just support them in any way that they can. Because, when you forget that you are loved, even for the slightest moment, your world will feel like hell on earth. It will be unbearable and you will get lost in a dark world. A world that may feel almost impossible to get out of. So, if ever, you feel weak, alone, stressed, frightened, always remember that you are loved and think positively. Because when you get to that point of always being negative, trust me, it will be harder for you to deal with things. And once that happens, all the stress seems to build up and it never seems to stop. I’m totally rambling and getting off topic… But basically, I just wanted to point out that I feel your pain. What hurts you, hurts me. I only hope that in your darkest times, you will be able to see your way out. And if you ever need a hand to help you out, I am always here.

 OMG….I can seriously relate. I couldn’t have said it better myself. Its refreshing to know I’m not the only one out there that is frustrated by these things.

Great Lessons of Life:

littlemiss:

• When someone lies to you, it teaches you that things are not always what they seem. The truth is often far beneath the surface. Look beyond the masks people wear if you want to know what is in their hearts. Remove your own masks to let people know who you really are.
• When someone steals from you it teaches you that nothing is forever. Always appreciate what you have. You never know when you might lose it. Never take your friends or family for granted, because today and sometimes only this very moment is the only guarantee you may have.
• When someone inflicts injury upon you, it teaches you that the human state is a very fragile one. Protect and take care of your body as best as you can, it’s the one thing that you are sure to have forever.
• When someone mocks you, it teaches you that no two people are alike. When you encounter people who are different from you, do not judge them by how they look or act, instead base it on the contents of what is in their hearts.
• When someone breaks your heart, it teaches you that loving someone does not always mean that the person will love you back. But don’t turn your back on love, because when you find the right person, the joy that one person brings you will make up for all of your past hurts. Times a thousand fold.
• When someone holds a grudge against you, it teaches you that everyone makes mistakes. When you are wronged, the most virtuous thing you can do is forgive the offender without pretense. Forgiving those who have hurt us is often the most difficult and painful of life’s experiences, but it is also the most courageous thing a person can do.
• When a loved one is unfaithful to you, it teaches you that resisting temptation is man’s greatest challenge. Be vigilant in your resistance against all temptations. By doing so, you will be rewarded with an enduring sense of satisfaction far greater than the temporary pleasure by which you were tempted.
• When someone cheats you, it teaches you that greed is the root of all evil. Aspire to make your dreams come true, no matter how lofty they may be. Do not feel guilty about your success, but never let an obsession with achieving your goals lead you to engage in malevolent activities.
• When someone ridicules you, it teaches you that nobody is perfect. Accept people for their merits and be tolerant of their flaws. Do not ever reject someone for imperfections over which they have no control.

• When someone loves us, it teaches us love, kindness, charity, honesty, humility, forgiveness, acceptance, and all of these can counteract all the evil in the world. For every good deed, there is one evil deed. Man alone has the power to control the balance between good and evil, but because the lessons of love are not taught often enough, the power is too often abused.
• When you enter someone’s life, whether by plan, chance or coincidence, consider what your lesson will be. Will you teach love or a harsh lesson of reality? When you die, will your life have resulted in more loving or more hurting? More comfort or more pain? More joy or more sadness? Each one of us has the power over the balance of the love in the world. Use it wisely!

The Complete Life's Little Instuction Book.

littlemiss:

1. Do battle against prejudice and discrimination wherever you find it.
2. Be romantic.
3. Let people know what you stand for and what you won’t stand for.
4. Be insatiably curious. Ask “why” a lot.
5. Measure people by the size of their hearts, not the size of their bank accounts.
6. Don’t forget, a person’s greatest emotional need is to feel appreciated.
7. Don’t waste time grieving over past mistakes. Learn from them and move on.
8. Keep your promises.
9. Seek out the good in people.
10. Take good care of those you love.

 I liked this.

Random thoughts.

What is sad is that I allow you to enter my mind with doubt and confusion when I feel like I’ve got it all right. You hit me with questions I myself can’t answer because I cannot find that answer in anyone else or don’t want to. Whether it be from the insecurities life brings me or anything that hits me in the heart, you know just what to say to make me question all my decisions. I hate it. Stop but dont stop.

I’m sorry this had to happen. I’m sorry you couldn’t tell me. I’m sorry that I couldn’t be there to help any of the situations that occurred. Ultimately, I feel like it was all my fault. I feel like a failure and that you were the one that told me that. Whenever I think about it, I wanted to ask you every question that popped up in my mind and just be open like we’ve always been and still have that connection we did before. But considering the circumstances, I can no longer think the same way. I can’t go back to that time. I can’t trust you the same way. I miss you, and I’m sad everything ended the way it did.

Thinking can be a very difficult, yet neccessary process. I think too much about everything. Though slow with recent events, I think of everything and relate it to the past. History is my forte. I know how to analyze the events that currently occur from then and learn from then. I can’t help it. I’m slow cause my mind is elsewhere for the most part. Thinking about other things…….

It was nice having lunch with you. I couldn’t have thought of a better person to learn from. I wish I could help you though. I wish I could do more for you. College scares me and you made it that much easier to think about. It’s something that has weighed on my mind for a while. My insecurities about all of it just unloaded on you. in one lunch. Thank you for everything :) I’ll keep in touch for sure.

I’m writing back soon promise. :) I know Ill be homesick too.

Stay waaanderfulll. You’ve been wonderful and I’m lucky to have you. :D

I really know youll be okay (: You are a strong and wonderful young woman that I know can overcome this obstacle. Be the kind and caring person you have always been and people will continue to surround you with that same compassion you show.

JM

polaroidary:

Don’t analyze for grammar, think instead that each sentence is just a thought running through the mind.

It saddens me. Just a thought. A playful distraction of the imagination. As friends depart and arrive to and from orientation. It dawns upon us. All of us. We will miss each other. More than we can possibly imagine. We will lose connections that were made through those four years of high school. The six years since middle school. The fifteen years since elementary school. Without a doubt some friendships will stay together, and some may even grow stronger. For the most part however, no… we will lose contact. And those that do stay together, well things wont exactly be the same as they were in high school. Or as they were before that. Or before that. It’s a terrible thing. Call it what you want. Pessimism, defeatists, terrible friendship. I’ll call it realism. College changes people. Life changes people. As the cliché goes, “life moves on.” How many of us really want to move on? I find it astounding, and tormenting, how hard it is to let go of high school. Not for all of us though. What scares me the most is the friendships breaking. It took years to build that trust, that connection, that drama, that love, that sex (for some), those stories, those heartbreaks, those heartfixes , those everythings. Those handholds. How could all that be gone in a matter of 3 months? 3 months. But who says it has to be gone. We’ll make it work, we’ll make it last. We’ll make it last. Prove me wrong, and make it last. I love to be wrong. Prove me wrong. For my own sake, prove me wrong. Please prove me wrong. Is that why these connections made between us all are called “relationships”. As relationships are built, trust is built, love is built. And it is the purpose of every ship to drift off into the world. For a lesser cause, a greater cause, into a world of nothingness and beauty. Some ships may be tossed through the storm, through the jagged rocks, and be damaged, be made weaker. Some return stronger, and more united. And some do not return at all. Is that the purpose of these relationships. To be tossed into the world. To do greater things. To let go. To change. Change isn’t a bad thing. It’s a scary thing, is a fun thing, it’s a wonderful thing. It’s an everything. New world, new problems, new friends, bring it on. Old friends? Can we make it last? Prove me wrong. Lets make it last. Please lets make it last. For the sake of ourselves right now. Lets make it last.

I will prove you wrong..I will. For the sake of all of us, I will prove you wrong. I have once before to AC. :) We can do this guys! I love you guys (and I’m sober.)

Love always,

Briii

Life lessons learned from John Hughes:

littlemiss:

• Even dorks can land babes. In “Weird Science” the guys may have to create the woman of their dreams, but in the end, real-life ladies come around and appreciate them for who they are once they get to know the dudes inside. Samantha Baker may be a sophomore nobody in “Sixteen Candles,” but she wins the heart of uber-popular jock, Jake Ryan. Even dorky Ted winds up with Jake’s hot prom date. See, dreams do come true!
• People are not always what they seem. In “The Breakfast Club,” the kids write a letter to the principal saying, “We think you’re crazy to make us write an essay telling you who we think we are…What do you care? You see us as you want to see us.” By the film’s end we discover that the popular girl is still a virgin, that the bully and the jock both have sensitive sides, that the weirdo was really just a pathological liar and that the nerd was potentially the the toughest of all. Consider all stereotypes shattered.
• Make the most of sibling rivalry. In just about every John Hughes film one sibling gets the short end of the stick. Take heed and don’t be jealous or hate on your brother or sister just because they’re more popular. You’d be better off teaming up.
• Parents aren’t perfect. Hughes portrays extreme circumstances where parents forget their daughter’s birthday (in “Sixteen Candles”) and even leave their young son behind when leaving on a family trip to Paris (in “Home Alone”). Since your folks were never that bad, maybe it’s time to cut them some slack.
• Disastrous vacations are what memories are made of. Hey, remember that time your dad decided you were all going on on a road trip to Wally World, but the car got virtually destroyed, your grandma died, the dog peed on your sandwiches and when you finally got to the theme park it was not only a dump, it was closed? These are the memories you’ll look back on and laugh at some day.
• Live life to the fullest. In the brilliant words of Ferris Bueller, “Life moves pretty fast. You don’t stop and look around once in a while, you could miss it.”

 Thas cute :) I believe that.

If Contradictions ruled the world, Oh wait, they do.

She makes me want to give up. She makes me want to try and prove her wrong. In a place so full of contradictions, you seem to fit in quite perfectly. There are things you think you know; those are called assumptions. There are things you really don’t know and were told otherwise; those are called lies. You have truly fit in this world of hypocritical reasoning and pride. I have a tendency to analyze exactly what you say and how you mock me. Condescending tone, facial expressions indicating all signs of frustration, and voice that could only express the utter anger and cruelty in with each word that phases me. Sadly enough, I have considered you someone that I could always look up to and admire. Someone that supposedly drives me to do well. It’s times like these where we are disappointed in each other. I’m nowhere near expressing that I am perfect, but I know there are flaws in your reasoning. Yet you always state I am wrong. I never understand your hypothetical questions that you attempt to find the answer too. Adolescence is one thing that we may not have in common, but just know that you share a juvenile trait yourself. Not to say that other people don’t, because you’re not alone. No one can escape this bias. I can’t escape it. I want to, but I can’t. I have to realize that you are human and make mistakes too. I’m sorry I can’t be perfect and I’m sorry you’re not either.

I apologize now for the jumbled points. One month. I’m tired.

I'm making my sister do AP Biology as a sophomore

polaroidary:

&she missed the summer assignment. I didn’t have a summer assignment last year, so I decided to do one in lieu of the one I never had. Everything following is real except for the letter:

AP BIO Summer Assignment 2009
Assignment #1
Letter of Introduction
Due: July 20, 2009 (or earlier)

Draft an e-mail to me following the directions below:

a. Use clearly written, full sentences.  Do not abbreviate words.  Use spell check.  This is a professional communication like you would have with a college professor, so let’s practice for your rapidly approaching future!

b. Make the Subject:  “AP Bio: Introduction to <Insert Your Name Here>”
(Do not include the quote marks or brackets, just the words)

c. Begin the e-mail with a formal salutation like “Ms. Burks,” or “Dear Ms. Burks,”

d. Introduce yourself (your name) and tell me a little bit about yourself, like:

• What do you like to do (hobbies, sports, music, interests, etc.)?

• Do you have a job?

• Tell me about your family (Mom? Dad? Guardian? Siblings? Pets?) What do your parents do for a living?

• What is the last book you read for fun?

• What did you enjoy from your earlier biology class?

• What are you looking forward to most in AP Biology?

• What are you most anxious about in AP Biology?

f. End the e-mail with a formal closing: “Cordially”, “Sincerely”, “Warm regards”, etc. and add your name as if you signed a letter.

AP Bio: Introduction to Katrina Dimacali
Dear Ms. Burks,
My name is Katrina Dimacali. I will be graciously partaking in your AP Biology course this year. I have a multitude of hobbies. I especially love gardening in my spare time, raising my cats (their names are Xylem and Phloem), and listening to the songs that I have grown to love from accelerated biology. I especially love the song “Chains.” I am currently a full time student. My mother is currently employed at UC Davis and fully supports my choice to take these advanced placement courses. My father works at a winery and will hopefully own a vineyard in the near future. The last book I read for fun was entitled “Biology,” which I was able to rent from the school library along with my other peers. I enjoyed everything from my earlier biology class, especially the germinating pea lab which I hope to complete again someday. I am most looking forward to keeping an interactive spiral in AP Biology as well as doing the project that I’ve heard about, “You Belong in the Zoo.” I am anxious yet excited to finally take the AP Biology exam in May. 
  Warm Regards,
   Katrina Dimacali

 I seriously couldn’t stop laughing and Kamille and Karey had to check to see if something was okay!! XP

Personal drive.

Just kicked in.